assasin

We.are.excited.for.schoo-the holidays.

AREN'T YOU?

baby let me love you

High School drama.

Tell me you love them.

Fantastic 6.

Hah.

I'm only gonna break break ya break break ya heart

I wrote somewhere that I think I will miss you.

I'm pretty sure I do now ):
you are one heck of a teacher.

if you see this girl, can you tell her where I am

Happy Birthday, Kong Min Xuan !

It was so crazy finding you over the net after so many million years, and you can even remember how I look like ! And I, on the other hand, had to look for our kindy pictures to spot you out.

But it was great knowing you over the years (: And I can remember tiny little things we did in kindy together. Thanks for remembering my face, girl ! hahahaha. loves.

you can't break a broken heart

Okay, I didn't pack up my books today.
But so what.
I've got two whole crazy free months to do it.
And I can bet you that if I pack one book everyday,
just put one book in a box each day,
by the end of my holidays, I'll still have loads of time to do nothing.


I wish I was pregnant.
Because when you're pregnant, you can pig out.
And not exercise.
And lay around in bed because you're sore everywhere.
PLUS,
people don't give you second looks because you're fat.
And now I wonder why fat people get second glances.
That's just stupid.

Anyway.
I had fun today.

she is love

So I decided today was different, I know exactly why it's different but it's not hitting me yet. Anyway, I went out for a nice brunch and then I put on a nice top. You know, just so that I can feel the excitement of today.

I don't have to crack a school book for three months and I'm still not feeling the excitement in that. I mean, I AM happy (and not so with the fact that I've been pigging out through out the studying period), but I feel like it's any normal day.

Tomorrow, I will pack up my books (okay, I'm probably lying) and maybe I'll feel the sense of freedom, like everyone is saying.

Because really, I should be having some fun. After the a thousand and one apple pies I had for two weeks straight, the one week of jogging (I think it was only three days, actually) and then there was the last minute studying and that one in the morning thing I did, where I got up to study History. I wonder if it was all worth it?

I had so much peace while entering the class everyday to sit for the test. It did not seem like it was a huge deal, sitting for another test and obviously, it was suppose to be a huge deal. Honestly, I just thought, oh wow. Another test, yipeedeedoodoo.

So, all I know is, the exams done and over because that's what everyone told me and well, according to every fifteen year old on Facebook, we're all free !

it's you, my love

I.do.not.want.to.go.to.school.

sugar rush

They say Chinese all likes Math and they're good in it. Last time I checked, I AM Chinese but I can't do Math. Something went wrong with my little brain wires when I was born, I think.

In a way, I'm not born Chinese then. I'm Asian.

And Asians' can choose whatever subjects they like. I like English and everything associated with it and that does not include Math and Science just because they're in English.

I can't believe I have to do Math to stay alive, I'm not gonna be counting sheep on my death's bed anyway. pfft.

somewhere only we know

We have that History test tomorow, don't we?
Well, if you haven't studied, I'm your friend here.







But I want to study but it's a Sunday and I don't study on Sundays and I feel so sad that I could cry because I did not study at all ):

Help.

cause love has no distance baby, no, not when it comes to you and me.

I never knew I could gobble up six pieces of bread in a day. Can you believe that?

Gaah, I've got a soar throat. School's starting, tell me if you're excited because I'm not excited and I don't see how anyone can be excited, please. It's school. Would you think straight?

I'm off for dinner, it's mummy's and aunty Lilia's birthday.







I can't wait for mine, it's in three months and two days time (:

stay close, don't go

Happy Birthday Mari-yum !

My achi ! (: You're a year older now and marks another year of our friendship ! I know we've only known each other for two years, but I still love you <3

But I don't like the fact that you look so good in pictures, no wait, you look good all the time. No matter what face you're pulling. I wish I looked that good all the time. HAHA. And you're exceptionally bubbly and happy all the time. Sometimes I wonder if you're ever sad. haha.

Hope you have an awesome possum birthday dear (:


Oh, you haven't replied my mail, Maaarrr.

you know it's never simple never easy

Oh Tasha. I tried doing your tag but it got so hard, so I gave up for today. ahahaha. I can't believe you chose Taylor Swift, I want to do Taylor Swift !

But anyway. I think school's being, I don't know what's the word. They're fake for one thing. As announced, some officers came to check up on the school and bla bla bla. It happens every year and every year, it seems the same. Suddenly, left, right, up and down, there's flowers and plants and so many green things. And suddenly, fountains that you never thought worked works. The teachers were all in class before we kids could even reach upstairs. I really wished those officers came unannounced.

On a different note, I thought Allison deserved to be in the Top 3, and that Adam Lambert should just be voted out.



And I don't know what else to update about, but I have this feeling, I'll want to write a poem soon. So watch out for my poem ! hahaha (:

without you

Math is dumb dumb dumb. I HATE Math.

My stomach's all twisted up in knots, and I don't know why.
It's like I'm excited, but I'm not excited.
Maybe I'm scared, but what is there to be scared about?

crack the shutters

I'm not a big fan of perfume, or maybe not a fan at all. But I think I am in love with Mariah Carey's Luscious Pink (:

I tried it in Canada and it was awesome. I kept sniffing on it and I think I went a wee bit high, but it was all good.

I would ask for the perfume, but then if you think about it, why? I don't use it and the best that I could make out of it is decoration. Which is a pretty good idea, don't you think? ahaha.

All my paragraphs so far has started with 'I'. Shows how much I love myself, because I love myself a lot.

There's so much to talk about but honestly is unappropriated for this blog. heh. I can't believe it's Sunday. That means I have to go to school tomorrow. How sad is my life? Schooling 5 days a week and only left 2 days a week to spend time to do exciting things. Which, does not turn out to be so exciting since you're all exhausted from 5 days of school. I think we should only get 2 days of school, because what is life, then, if you're gonna stick your face in a Math textbook 24/7? I can add that exams, it just adds to the stress. Conclusion is, school is dumb and the government should consider making school days two days a week so that we kids can have a life.


Am I random or what?

over my head

It being Chinese New Year, I was off to my grandparents house again. Am I not happy my uncle decided to go for a buffet lunch instead of lunch at my grandparents house? Oh yeah, I'm so happy.

Tonight, we'll be going to my uncle's place for a change because I protested having dinner at my grandparent's. I also bribed my aunt with a cake. I think I'm good.

Even though it's Chinese New Year and all, teachers are still taking this opportunity to give us a stack of homework. They don't excuse we Chinese from this pile of work either. I'm not being racist and if it weren't for this one particular teacher, I wouldn't have posted this too.

We were complaining about the amount of work a certain teacher gave and she merely told us it was Chinese New Year and we had a week off. Some of us said we had visiting to do, no time to even check our school bags. The answer was simple : " Ala, Tahun Baru Cina je la. Kalau Hari Raya tu, cikgu faham la. " ( It's only Chinese New Year, if it were Hari Raya, I would understand. ) . The first thing that came to my mind was, I do not want to do my work. Because of this teacher, because of what she said. I don't think it's fair that this teacher is taking sides. And the story would be much more interesting if you knew her background. Go figure.

On another thought, I think the song 'Fall For You' by Secondhand Serenade is really good for contemporary dance. heh.

Can you believe, I can't find a single dance studio around Subang Jaya area that offers Jazz classes. The closest to Jazz I can get is Funk, and I don't even want to do that.

I'm bored, really.

for you, I will

Ciarra (: She asked her mother where May jie jie and Serena jie jie was. The mum told her that we've gone far away, nearer to her grandmother. She asked her mother to call us through the computer (:

School has been a total drag for me. I've been mounted with this load of homework, most of them from the week I missed out. It's awful, and plus, I'm going through jet-lag, it wakes me up at 4.30 am every morning. I'm drained out by the weekend and I'm looking forward for a little rest when I find out there's replacement classes. I didn't want to go, really. But my mum made a point when she told me that I've already missed a week of school. So, another early morning. And another early morning for church.

Even now, I'm starting my second week of school and I have to catch up on so much. I'm pretty much left behind. My teachers are bugging me for homework from the week before. I wish I was there on the first day of school, so that I wouldn't be left behind.

Then again, I didn't mind being in Canada (:

So while I'm trying to do all these work, I'm thinking about how laid back school is in Canada. How passing up assignments a week late doesn't affect anything. That's so mellow.

And I have to take a big big test. Whoopy. Everyone is coming up to me, asking my age and when they find out it's big exam year, they get so excited and remind me. Like I don't know I'm sitting for PMR this year. One day, I want to answer someone like this,

" I'm taking PMR? Ohmygsh, I didn't know that ! "

I went shopping again ! YAY ! But but, it wasn't shopping for things I want - instead things I need. That doesn't sound interesting anymore, does it? Well, it doesn't to me.

I've officially fallen head over heels for tea (:

My god mum asked me today what I wanted to do after high school. I told her I had at least a year before thinking about all that. Her answer was simple. Time goes by fast. Which got me thinking about what I really wanted to do. All my life, I've always dreamed big about what I wanted to be, just in the end failing to master it all. Everyone knows that I love writing. And some people knows I want to be a writer too. But, maybe there's something else for me, something else that is meant for me, instead of writing. Who knows? I can't decide too fast either.

It's hard, not to have my biggest supporter in life to help me out now.

the little things

I thought being in a top class would be everything - good teachers and good company. Was I wrong? Yes I was.

If the last class now has the better teachers, like teachers that can actually say a word of English and teaches Math or Science, I want a transfer.

So, I may not have much friends around my class, and to a certain point, I don't really mind. It helps me focus a little bit more. But, sometimes, when you need help, when you need a little perking up, feeling awkward doesn't really help.

But maybe there's a little bit to rejoice for. I got the toughest teacher for my Bahasa Melayu subject. No, of course we won't get sneak peeks in her massively hard papers, but hey - she could be a lot of help. Who knows?

Because of jet-lag, I've been pretty much sleepy all day in school. I brought tea, to see if it'll wake me up. I think it helped a tiny bit, but not really. Then again, who cares?

I felt really left behind in class. We're on second topic for Math, my oh-so-favourite subject. Something tells me that my Math teacher isn't the best and isn't gonna help me at any rate. Yay her. Other than all that, I've got lots of catching up to do.

And since it's the new year, I'm looking around for different activities to take part in all year long. Oh yeah, so it is PMR year, yada yada yada. I don't expect myself to study every single day for this thing. Out of 6 days of studies, I think it's no biggie to give myself 2 days of something different.

Anyway, back to the topic of school. Let's say it was the worse first day of school ever. I took back my results from last year's finals and I found out I dropped tremendously from my mid-year. But I still made it to a better class. Still, I'm not happy with the results ):

So, since I was entirely lost in my class, guess what I was dreaming about?
Canada, together with all my cousins and relatives. Including this favourite cousin of mine (:

Also my very warm friend that accompanies me in bed every morning. And every other day when I'm home alone. I miss Mika ):

Madison and Jadyn, the second generation cousins that I've never ever met before. They're the sweetest ever.

My dance mates - I want to dance in the noisiest class again. I never got to say goodbye to you Joanne ): So here's to you (: We'll watch the whole of Sweeny Todd again one day :D

I've become a massive fan of Canada. Now, isn't that bad since I'm a citizen of Malaysia?

I'll be the princess

Can you believe how time flies? School started today and well, it felt like it was only a week ago that school ended. So rise and shine early in the morning for school now. It was a long day today. I'm exhausted now, really. But it was nothing from school, really.

Because, I wasn't in school.

Not that I'm trying to rub it in or anything. But, yeah. I'm still on holiday.

Actually, I kinda wished I could be there on the first day of school. So many many nice things happened. Like Jonathan Chee with a luggage bag. You don't see that everyday. Now THAT, should go into the yearbook.

It's really not that I want to leave Canada so fast, but I still wished I was there on the first day. Make that the first week.

But I love Canada. And the family here.

My sister and I thought this cousin, Jonathan - the oldest cousin, the lala. From 1 until 10. I personally like the 10 (:

What can I say? It's not just being with the family that lives in Canada, it's being with the family I've been with for 14 years (:

And really, I've been fighting with my sister so much lately. But hey, all siblings does that. Though I think we're old enough to stop all these. We haven't fought in awhile. And I still love her (:

Basically, I love the whole family. They're awesome.

I'll taste every moment, and live it out loud

It's just a few days away from the new year (: Is that not great? Like what most people feel right now, I too feel as if the year has gone by so fast. Too fast, maybe.

I did not expect an awesome year this year. With the biggest piece of my heart missing, I dreaded school. I was afraid to go back to school. I sometimes felt like shedding a few tears just thinking about school. Obviously, I did not have a choice. School is school. I went to school on the first day just to find out that my friends still had an attitude towards me. Being that they were all together most of the end year holidays, they were really tight. I hated school more.

Also seeing my class, filled with people that I did not know at all, I freaked out. Yeah, I should be making new friends and all, but I felt awkward. So this Indian girl settled down next to me on that first day of school. For days and days, we only talked about things on the line. She'll ask me if I have done my homework, or if she could take a look at my book. Oh yeah, I definitely loathe school then.

But, I continued to try to fit in again. Not by being someone I did not know, just being myself. And now, see? See the friends I have made. That Indian girl that sat next to me, she turned out to be a great company. I thought about how others suffer more than me, and I? I should not ever be given a chance to pout. I am perfect to some people, who barely have anything left. I still had my family and other friends. I most importantly, had God with me.

He went everywhere with me, He did not let go of me. This whole year, my biggest thanks goes to HIM. Maybe next year will be hectic or frustrating. It will be busy and full of brand new challenges that everyone will struggle with. If He is putting you in this test, basically, you know you can do it.

Maybe over the year I have pulled myself back from so many things. I just need time to adjust through it all. Everything is different now, I do not have my human role model with me, I do not have my anchor to help me, I do not have my dad to encourage me anymore. I did not want to make a wrong move, so I pulled myself back. Now, I know I need to try. You will definitely have up's and down's in this place. That's the way it was set to be.

Christmas is just round the corner, I cannot wait. Celebrating Jesus' birthday, it is like celebrating my own.

I was fine, 'till 7.05

I just visited Carolyn's. It was a so happen kinda thing, because I decided to go through my link list. So yeah, first thing I see is a picture of Emily Wong, a fellow school mate who is just so sweet. Anyway. I scanned through the post and it they've known each other for 8 years, I think, already. So Carolyn went on to tell about how they both met. She said, it was the first day of school and it had something to do with pencils. And, boom ! I realized it's probably the same way I met my ' ex-best friend ' as we both call it, Soong Mei Shia (:

Sorry, I could not get a picture. I wanted to snag one from Facebook, and I realized Mei Shia does not have a Facebook. Then, I considered Friendster, and said no because it seems that Friendster has virus, so yeah. Scratch all that.

Anyway. Shucks, I typed a whole load and it got deleted. pfft. So, I met Mei Shia day one of Primary School. Or maybe not. At least Mei Shia said it wasn't, it was this 'test' thing that we had to take before the school semesters. Orientation, I suppose. And well, we all head off to class and I guess Mei Shia didn't expect anything so she didn't bring any stationery. My mum asked me to lend her one of my pencil. So there, one pencil for Mei Shia and we couldn't be separated since.

During that orientation, they gave a 'test', like I've said. And it was like easy-peasy until it came to this part where they put a few letters with blanks. Something like this,

a, _, _, d, e, _, _, _, i

Well, yeah. I stared at it and I was thinking,

" What's this? "

So, I quietly lean over and see what Mei Shia was doing. Turns out, they were asking for the ABC's ! So, yay yay, I wrote everything down. The same thing came out for the Math session, asking for numbers. I was smarter that time (: haha.

Until now, I don't know why we aren't best friends anymore. Maybe it was because we got into different classes after Standard 3. Which was not fair to me at first. When both our parents found out we were both in different classes, they just never ceased to tell us that we should continue being best friends. It didn't work out, I guess.

Above all this, I think we had an awesome time all those 3 years. At least I did have a really good time hanging out with her. For her birthday this year, I gave her a pencil and she gave me this questioning look and started laughing. But I also gave her a note, and I told her that I won't ever forget the time we met. Honestly, I wanted to get the exact brand of pencil that I landed her that day. Maybe I can remember the little small details that no one else can during a long time ago, but this, it's the one thing I just can't remember.

Oh yeah, I love this girl. I can go on and on about how the times we spent together, but maybe some things, should just be our memories. There's not much speciality to it once everyone knows, right?